important events

Excerpt from When Therapy Isn’t Enough:

John Bradshaw, in his book Healing the Shame that Binds You, states: “Twelve-step groups literally were born out of the courage of two people risking coming out of hiding. One alcoholic person (Bill W.) turned to another alcoholic person (Dr. Bob) and they told each other how bad they really felt about themselves. I join with Scott Peck in seeing this dialogue coming out of hiding as one of the most important events of this century.”

I join with John Bradshaw and Scott Peck in seeing the dialogue between Bill W. and Dr. Bob, in which they each came out of hiding and gave birth to 12-Step groups, as one of the most important events of the 20th century. I believe that another important event of the 20th century, a building block on what Bill W. and Dr. Bob did, is what John Baker and Rick Warren did. John Baker understood the vision God gave him for a Christ-centered recovery program and acted on it, giving birth to Celebrate Recovery. Rick Warren gave John Baker the needed permission and support to establish and build Celebrate Recovery at Saddleback Church in Southern California and then take it to the world.

Link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1625861117/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1531867727&sr=1-2&keywords=When+Therapy+Isn%27t+Enough

 

healing: a process

Excerpt from When Therapy Isn’t Enough:

Due to the dysfunction in the family I grew up in, I entered adulthood with many emotional and spiritual wounds, destructive habits and crippling hang-ups, most of which were outside my awareness. I began a healing process in my early adulthood even though I did not have a clear idea of what needed to be healed.

… the first step in my healing process was engaging in psychotherapy…Psychotherapy helped me to change on the outside; my inside, however, remained untouched for a very long time. Without consciously realizing it, I accepted this as normal, assuming I had reached the end of the healing process.

While still in therapy I added secular recovery (ACOA ALANON) to my healing process. Secular recovery taught me that I was not alone. I learned firsthand that other people had life experiences similar to mine and had similar feelings to mine.

In 2003 I stumbled upon Celebrate Recovery, a Christ-centered 12-Step recovery program, and that has made all the difference for me. Through working a program that continually pointed me toward Jesus, I learned how to access his healing power. My childhood wounds were finally healed—not coped with but healed. My habits are being broken one by one, and my crippling hang-ups have evaporated. They have been replaced with faith and trust in my Higher Power, Jesus Christ.

Link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1625861117/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1531867727&sr=1-2&keywords=When+Therapy+Isn%27t+Enough

 

healing words

Dedication, When Therapy Isn’t Enough: “To individuals carrying emotional and spiritual wounds. The words in this book, both my words and the words of others, are written to you and for you. Words are powerful. They can hurt or they can heal. They can entertain, encourage, criticize or fill any one of numerous other functions. The words in this book are meant to be healing words, helping words. They are written in the sincere hope that they will help you make sense of your experiences, encourage you, challenge you and comfort you.”

Link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1625861117/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1531867727&sr=1-2&keywords=When+Therapy+Isn%27t+Enough

 

paths to healing

Excerpt from new book:

When one is struggling with emotional and/or spiritual wounds, destructive habits and/or crippling hang-ups that are impeding one’s life and are most probably rooted in toxic shame, three available avenues for healing are psychotherapy, secular recovery and Christ-centered recovery. Though therapy and secular recovery undeniably help people to change for the better, it has been my experience that neither one can take you the distance. Only God, personified in Jesus Christ, can love with perfect, unconditional love, and because of this he is the only one who can heal toxic shame. Therefore, a program such as Celebrate Recovery that acknowledges God as the healer and is continually pointing people toward God for their healing is the most effective at healing toxic shame.

John Bradshaw, in his book Healing the Shame that Binds You, states: “Twelve-step groups literally were born out of the courage of two people risking coming out of hiding. One alcoholic person (Bill W.) turned to another alcoholic person (Dr. Bob) and they told each other how bad they really felt about themselves. I join with Scott Peck in seeing this dialogue coming out of hiding as one of the most important events of this century.”

I join with John Bradshaw and Scott Peck in seeing the dialogue between Bill W. and Dr. Bob, in which they each came out of hiding and gave birth to 12-Step groups, as one of the most important events of the 20th century. I believe that another important event of the 20th century, a building block on what Bill W. and Dr. Bob did, is what John Baker and Rick Warren did. John Baker understood the vision God gave him for a Christ-centered recovery program and acted on it, giving birth to Celebrate Recovery. Rick Warren gave John Baker the needed permission and support to establish and build Celebrate Recovery at Saddleback Church in Southern California and then take it to the world.

In case you might be interested in purchasing it, here’s the link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1625861117/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1531867727&sr=1-2&keywords=When+Therapy+Isn%27t+Enough

 

 

 

Is there Hope after Therapy?

     My answer to the question “Is there Hope after Therapy?” is a resounding YES! How I came to ask this question and how I came to answer it in this way comprises the story of my life journey.

     My name is Mary Detweiler. I am a believer in Jesus Christ and I am an Adult Child of a Dysfunctional Family. Though my parents were together, they were each broken individuals with many hurts, habits and hang-ups. That’s what made the family dysfunctional, and that’s what resulted in my growing up wounded. None of the wounds I incurred growing up were physical. I was not abused physically or sexually. The wounds were emotional. Though my home was almost always filled with people and activity, I grew up feeling isolated, alone and disconnected from everyone. I was empty inside and I believed I had no inherent worth or value. Since I had no idea of how to get the acceptance, value and love that I craved I tried to get them in very unhealthy ways which only led to me feeling even more empty and worthless.

     When I left my family and struck out on my own in my early 20’s I left with many hurts, habits and hang-ups of my own, most of which I was unaware of. A major focus of my adult life has been becoming aware of, recovering from and healing the wounds of my childhood.

     When I was a senior in high school (several decades ago) I took psychology. It grabbed hold of me right away and didn’t let go. Learning that there were reasons that people did what they did and felt what they felt was fascinating to me. I went to college where I earned a B.A. in Psychology and then on to graduate school where I earned a Masters Degree in Clinical Social Work, MSW. I started working as a psychotherapist. At the same time that I was working as a psychotherapist I was in therapy myself as a client. Learning what made me tick in my own therapy and helping others figure out what made them tick in my professional work was endlessly fascinating to me.

      Through therapy I learned to make healthier choices, exhibit healthier behaviors, and engage in healthier relationships. In spite of all these positive changes, however, an internal emptiness and discontent remained. Though I identified and connected to the wounds I had incurred during childhood, those wounds did not heal.

      In 2003 I stumbled upon a Christ-centered recovery program called Celebrate Recovery. I worked the Celebrate Recovery program and have continued to be involved with Celebrate Recovery ever since. It was through working this program that my childhood wounds were finally healed, not coped with but healed.

      I recently wrote a book about how Celebrate Recovery helped me. The title of the book is When Therapy Isn’t Enough, How to fill the holes counseling doesn’t fill. I self published it through Partnership Publications, a division of Dove Christian Fellowship International. The book is accompanied by a CD titled Songs of Healing.

      I created this blog as a way of getting the word about my book out into the world. I am new to blogging and, as I am technologically impaired, I am way outside my comfort zone doing this. I’m willing to tolerate this discomfort, however, because I very much want the world to know about the healing that is available through working a Christ-centered recovery program. This seems like a good channel to get the word out (at least I’ve been told that) so, here I am.

      I am now taking another step outside my comfort zone by beginning to link to other blogs (which I’m not even sure I’m doing right). Please accept this link in the spirit that it is meant and, if you feel so moved, check out my blog and, if you feel moved even further, consider responding to me.