I have recently become a fan of author Colson Whitehead. I read his two most recent books, The Underground Railroad and The Nickel Boys. Mr. Whitehead’s writing is excellent though the content is emotionally difficult to read. I particularly like the following words of Mr. Whitehead in his introduction to The Nickel Boys:

“It was the spring of 2017, and I lived in a nation divided. After the last presidential election, it was impossible to ignore the unending barrage of chaos and strife, particularly when it came to race. How to reconcile the racial progress we’ve made since my grandparents’ generation with our current regression into bitterness, discord, and rage? … In writing these boys into existence, I might give voice to my own fear and confusion but also speak, in whatever small way I can, for the real-life survivors of the Arthur G. Dozier School for Boys, my model for the Nickel Academy…Writing this book is one small way of bearing witness…”


My new book, When Success Isn’t Enough, purpose is plenty will be available as a print book and as an ebook in a few weeks. Excerpt: “This book is about the similarities and differences between living a life of success and living a life of purpose.”


Another excerpt from When Success Isn’t Enough, soon to be released.

“When I allowed God to be in the driver’s seat of my life, I experienced the peace and joy that can come only from God. When I put myself back in the driver’s seat of my life, I was looking for that peace and joy to come from human achievements and human relationships. What I received were the peace and joy that the world gives. Having experienced both scenarios, I can tell you that the peace and joy that the world gives are hollow compared to the peace and joy that God gives.”


My new book, When Success Isn’t Enough, purpose is plenty will be available in a month or so. Excerpt: “‘I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly’” (John 10:10 RSV). Jesus spoke these words after he had given sight to a man who had been born blind…The abundance that Jesus referred to is not financial or material abundance. It is an abundance of life. He wants us to live a life in which we are happy, fulfilled, energized, and passionate.

I have a new book, currently in the process of being published. Title: When Success Isn’t Enough, purpose is plenty. Excerpt:

If one is to freely choose his or her definition of success, and then act on it, one has to embrace the belief that he or she has a choice; that he or she is in charge of their life and can set the direction or course of their life. If one does not embrace this belief, then he or she gives that choice away, allowing others to chart the course of their life… Purpose is radically different from success. The most significant difference is the starting point. When developing our definition of success, the starting point is ourselves. When attempting to discern our purpose, the starting point is God.

To those struggling with anxiety and/or depression during this pandemic, you may find When Therapy Isn’t Enough helpful. Excerpt:

When God designed our bodies, he instilled in us a natural healing process for when we get injured or sick. Just watch the way a cut heals for an example of this. The healing process doesn’t always happen in the way or the timing that we want, though. This is because we are not in charge of our own healing–God is. The healing is God’s choice, it’s always God’s choice…God is respectful…he doesn’t force his healing on us. He gave us free will. This means that we have the power to make choices, and the choices that we make can either allow God to heal us or hinder him from healing us. Our choices can either facilitate the natural healing process or block it.

Link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1625861117/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1531867727&sr=1-2&keywords=When+Therapy+Isn%27t+Enough


It’s getting harder and harder to wait for this pandemic to be over, whenever that may be. One of the hardest things for me is that I can’t DO anything other than obey the stay at home order. As I was thinking about this, I was reminded of some words of my own that I wrote. Excerpt, When Doing Isn’t Enough:

 We have all experienced times of waiting in our lives. We might not have liked it or chosen it; however, we have experienced it. We may have tolerated it or hated it or waited in anger or waited in fear or waited in expectancy. We may have decided to put the time to good use like reading a book or working on a laptop while in a waiting room or we may have paced or we may have slept. We may have smoked cigarettes or drank coffee or did any combination of any of these or any other of a multitude of additional coping mechanisms. However we have chosen to wait though, we have waited.

Link: https://www.amazon.com/When-Doing-Enough-Waiting-Plenty/dp/1625860838/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1508523850&sr=8-3&keywords=books+by+mary+detweiler

As my time staying at home due to the coronavirus pandemic drags on (almost six weeks now) with no definite end in sight, I have had to recommit to implementing some previously learned lessons in my life. After all, it seems like an unavoidable truth that some lessons need to be learned, then relearned over and over again. Somehow, one learning experience does not seem quite enough for the more difficult or important lessons.

When I worked the 12 Steps in Celebrate Recovery, I learned that the only things I have control over are my choices and my behavior. I have no control over what anyone else does, says, or thinks. I only have control over how I choose to react to someone else.

I was reminded of this lesson as I was watching and reading about the protests going on in various cities around the country. Though I wholeheartedly support people’s right to protest, seeing people standing shoulder to shoulder with no masks on and obviously not adhering to social distancing guidelines, greatly upset me. Though I was upset about how many more people might get sick and/or die, both those protesting and those who the protesters would later come into contact with, I was also upset about how this might extend the need for me to stay isolated at home. I wish I could say these selfish thoughts did not enter my head but alas, they did.

Anyway, as I’ve been thinking about and processing all this the last few days, I am recommitting to not staying upset and angry about this and to not let it dominate my thoughts and current limited activities. Wish me luck!

If you are having difficulty waiting for the coronavirus pandemic to be over, you might find When Doing Isn’t Enough helpful.

Excerpt: “Don’t just do something. Stand there!” As a task-oriented individual who has historically functioned as an overachiever, I had great difficulty wrapping my mind around this concept. `Just being and not doing went against my grain on a very deep level…while we’re waiting there are many choices we need to make…we can choose to sink into despair or we can choose to wait in expectant hope. We can choose to be patient (regardless of how we feel) or we can choose to be impatient and irritable and drive ourselves and people around us crazy.

Link: https://www.amazon.com/When-Doing-Enough-Waiting-Plenty/dp/1625860838/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1508523850&sr=8-3&keywords=books+by+mary+detweiler

To anyone having difficulty coping with social distancing, you might find When Doing Isn’t Enough helpful.

Excerpt: Waiting is not popular in our modern society. Immediate gratification is popular. We want what we want now, and we do everything possible to get whatever it is we want now and avoid waiting. Sometimes, waiting is unavoidable though and we have no choice but to wait.

Link: https://www.amazon.com/When-Doing-Enough-Waiting-Plenty/dp/1625860838/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1508523850&sr=8-3&keywords=books+by+mary+detweiler